Jellyfish Alert!

If you were thinking of taking a dip in the sea today, then think again.
Last night, in the wee small hours, I heard a disturbing radio programme about jellyfish.

It turns out they're increasing by the bucketload, especially in areas that have been overfished.

As well as being able to kill people with their stings, they have recently brought a US warship to its knees (I know warships don't have knees, but you know what I mean), by blocking the water intake.

They've also caused similar problems to nuclear power stations in the Phillipines and Japan.

I've forgotten what else they've done, but the main gist is that jellyfish are taking over the world and we're all going to die or become slaves to jellyfish and have to live under jellyfish laws.

Some bits and bobs about jellyfish:

They haven't got a brain. Is a brain what separates plants from animals? Do all animals, however tiny, have a brain? They must be very small. Can you imagine an aphid's brain? It's no wonder you never hear of brain surgery being performed on aphids. You'd have to have very tiny surgical instruments and a keen-eyed surgeon.

There's lots of old computers around these days. Surely someone could wire one up to a jellyfish as a rudimentary thinking device? I would have a go, but I find that when I tamper with the fundamentals of nature, I often end up unleashing deadly forces that I can't control.

The Box jellyfish is the most venomous creature known to man (they didn't say what's the most venomous creature known to women).

Some jellyfish have twenty-four eyes. But what's the use of two dozen eyes without a brain to connect them to?

The Portuguese Man O'War is known as the Bluebottle in Australia. Seems a bit of a comedown.
It isn't really a jellyfish at all, but a colony of four different sorts of polyps.

Don't ask me what a polyp is. Although I do know that young jellyfish are called polyps.

That's about it for jellyfish.